People with two Gods! The cognitive dissonance

one day as I sat in the masjid, surrounded by pious souls, the imam preached; "Allah knows the Sinners among us". Earlier in the week, a  bombing in Mogadishu took the lives of hundreds of innocent bystanders. lives lived but extinguished in an instant. All "allegedly" by the name of God!. but which god? 

I wondered - cynically- "How many killers are among us in this blessed congregation?" 

A nation (Soomaalida oo dhan) riddled by decades of war, Hundreds of thousands killed by their kinsmen either directly Qori caaradii or indirectly by the mayhem that ensued, via lack of access to food, water, healthcare and or sheer starvation. How many were publicly stood trial for their transgressions? obviously none!. 

Many older Somalis are consumed by guilt, by screams from their past, nightmares of innocent people they shot point-blank and graves they lined with bodies. they work with us, go to the mosque and pray, they put up a visage to the rest of us, yet they remain tortured in their minds. 

Dhagar qabe dhulkaa u dhaqdhaqaaqa is a somali proverb. 

some others are astronomically worse, they capitalized on everything they have done, they rationalized hate and murder!. they are the fighters that brought "us" freedom, the defenders of "our" freedom or simply "some call themselves Mujaahid , Siyaasi, Halgamaa, Janaraal and similar pompous names are uttered for such damned souls.   

Both are a reflection of what has become of our nation, a whole nation living in collective denial. we mourn for the victims and celebrate the perpetrator. what is even worse is that the victims revere their assailants!. after all, memories are a tricky thing, yesternight's killer can become today's Hero. 

Dumarkuba Xublada foosha way xanaf wareeraane,
Balse inay xis daranyihiin , Xaylka kale mooge. 

when I was at school in Borama sometime between 1999-2000, there was an altercation between two local clans over a wretched piece of land, this has led to few deaths on both sides. one of my school teachers lectured us that day about how Somalis have two Gods, a small God they worship when then head off to the mosque or attend a funeral and another rather more influential God that helps them decide everything else in their lives. by the latter he implied Qabiil/Tribe!. 

curiously, as a young lad, I knew the Qabiil of everyone in that class including all our teachers, it was the norm, a testatement to the times.  but to this day I have no idea about that particular Teacher's Qabiil. All what I recall is his utter disdain with everything Qabiil related and to this day that analogy of his stuck with me....